HAPPY NEW YEAR

Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had an amazing year because I know I sure did! I decided to hop on the bandwagon and take a look back at 2013. It was fun to go through all my photos and see what an great year 2013 was! Here are some of the highlights.

January

+ ODC half times

+ Watched the vibe show "Floored" at the Scera.

+ Hit my first 100 likes on Instagram

February

+ Had a Valentine for the first time

+ Lost my best friend, Sydney, to suicide

March

+ 18th birthday

+ California with Davis for ten days

+ Watched a lot of basketball

April

+ cuddled lots. (that's everyday)

+ Keys to Success assembly

+ Fun double dates to Nicklecade 

May

+ Graduated high school

+ ODC Spring concert-performed my first solo ever

+ Took Senior pictures

+ One Year Anniversary with Davis

June

+ Went to Lagoon

+ Davis got his diploma

+ Summerfest

+ Cooper's Run parade

+ Started teaching dance class at Dance Showcase Company

July

+ Davis' birthday

+ Laci's birthday

+ Went to the Hogle Zoo

+ Spent the Fourth of July at the Johnson Mill

August

+ Swiss Days

+ Made Davis get over his fear of snakes

September

+ cut my hair

+ BYU vs UT game

+ Louisa left on her mission

+ more Swiss Days fun

October

+ Halloween

+ My nephew Thomas was born

November

+ Thanksgiving with Davis' family

+ started to nanny for my cousin Tiffany

+ Jake left on his mission

+ My niece Ceni was born

December 

+ Christmas

+ New Years

+ Temple Square

+ Saw White Christmas with Davis' family

+ Hung out at the Johnson Mill

+ Winter cruises

+ my best friend Ellie left on her mission. 

2013 was definitely a year I won't forget, but I'm excited to see what 2014 has in store for me. 

MY FRIEND SYDNEY - SIX MONTHS TOO LONG WITHOUT YOU

I remember the day we lost Sydney like it was yesterday.

Now it's been six months and there hasn't been a day that she hasn't crossed my mind.

February 7, 2013 I had gotten home from school early as usual and was hanging out with Davis. Things were normal until I got a text from my friend Liz saying, "Erika, did you hear about Sydney?" I was a little thrown off and thought maybe she had gotten in a car accident or something. Before I could even reply my phone started to ring, it was my best friend Ellie. Barely able to talk, Ellie told me the news. I was in shock and didn't believe her. I remember asking her if this was all a joke. It wasn't. It was as real as it gets. I cried and cried and cried. I had lost one of my best friends. The next few days were very hard and emotional. Davis was going to Washington for the weekend to see his family and I was going to be left alone with a million thoughts.

February 8, 2013 I didn't go to school. I had, had a restless night and got little sleep. I had to take Davis to the airport so I got my sad self together and took him. I was excited for him to go be with his family, but I honestly needed him more than ever. I was a mess. After I dropped him off I cried the whole way home. I didn't want to do anything that night, but ODC had to perform at half time. Luckily, I had Ellie by my side and we made it through the performance. We danced for Sydney that night. After we danced Ellie, Liz, and I went to Hunter's house to have a girls night. We had all been close to Sydney and needed each other during this hard time. We looked at old pictures and told stories about Sydney. We laughed together and we cried together. It was one of the best experiences and I am so grateful that I had them. 

February 9, 2013 I went to Happy Sumo with my sister Laci. Sushi was Sydney's favorite food. It was hard for me to be there, since one of the last times I had been there was for Syd's seventeenth birthday.

That night, I decided to go to the gym and work out to get things off my mind. I was missing my boyfriend and Sydney like crazy and was an emotional wreck. It was snowing a lot so the roads were icy. I was driving on University Parkway when I had a close encounter with truck. I was going straight threw the light and he turned right in front of me while I was going forty mph. If the roads would have been normal, I could have just slammed on my breaks and everything would have been fine, but I couldn't. All I could do was swerve into the other lane. I lost control of my car and some how I ended up safely on the side of the road. I know it sounds cheesy, but I honestly believe that Sydney was there with me and saved me that night. If I would have hit them, I would have totaled my car and been hurt pretty badly. As much as I hated the fact that Sydney wasn't with me on earth, I was so grateful that I had her as an angel by my side that night. I cried and cried some more. It was becoming too normal to cry at any and all times.

A few days went by. Things were getting a little easier, but it was still harder than ever. Davis finally came home and it felt so good to not feel so alone. I had to prepare myself to see Sydney for the last time. I was nervous to go to her viewing. I did't know how I was going to react when I saw her for the last time. When I arrived, the line was HUGE. Sydney had so many friends and everyone loved her. I met up with Ellie and luckily she was towards the front. While we waited, my stomach had the craziest butterflies. Every inch closer, I got more and more nervous. I had millions of emotions flying threw me.  I was mad at Sydney for putting us all through this. I was mad that I had to see her like this and feel this way. When we finally reached her, everything just went away. I felt numb. I then had an overwhelming feeling of peace. I knew that even though Sydney had made the wrong decision, it was what she wanted and I had to be okay with it. I finally found closure and boy did it feel good. Yes, I was still emotional and sad, but it was from that point on that I knew I had to be okay with out her. As much as I wanted her here, she wasn't and wouldn't be. 

this is my favorite picture of sydney and i. we were in hong kong together and wearing the same lip stick.

I miss Sydney. I can't believe that six months have already gone by. Everyday something reminds me of her. I dream about her sometimes. I love her so much and I am grateful to have such an amazing angel watching over me. Sydney was an amazing friend and I'm happy that I had the opportunity to know her. I LOVE YOU SYDNEY TAYLOR BRUNING.

A SPECIAL DAY

sydney taylor bruning is a person that i will forever hold close to my heart. 

i officially met sydney my junior year. i say officially because i had known who sydney was long before i got the chance to meet her. she was miss popular. she lived, what seemed, a perfect life. she was a dancer, as was i. she decided, along with a few of her other dance friends, to make the studio switch and come to where i danced, the vibe. everyone was excited for her to come. none of us knew her well, but we were all curious to see what she could bring to our team. she was very outgoing from day 1 and everyone learned to love her very quickly. not much time passed before sydney was one of my best friends...

through out the year, we had the chance to share many stages together. while dancing together, we were able to bond everyday in rehearsals.  i even got to travel to the other side of the world with her. she made me laugh the hardest i've ever laughed. she's done some of the most craziest things i've ever seen a girl do. she was always taking things to the next level. she was hilarious! now, all i have are those memories and photographs of our times. 

feb. 7, 2013 was the day everything changed. this was the day that i learned sydney had ended her life. this was one of the most challenging experiences that i've had to conquer in my 18 years of life.

we celebrated her birth yesterday. it was an amazing day dedicated to sydney. the weather was beautiful and everything was at peace. i was able to visit her for her big day. what a blessing it was to be able to go to her grave site with two of my {and sydney's} closest friends.

i was fortunate enough to be able to spend the evening celebrating with sydney's dearest friends and family. we ate her favorite foods and laughed about the amazing times we all got to spend with her. 

sydney is one of the amazing girls i have ever met. she was so selfless and cared so much about everyone. i miss her so much and there isn't a day that goes by that i don't think about our friendship. i am so lucky, because i was able to have sydney in my life. i wish she could have been here with me today so i could have given her a huge birthday hug and 18 spankings. 

i love you sweet girl. i hope you had an amazing birthday, partying hard like i know you would have if you would have been down here on earth with us.